Books, videos, and websites for Third Culture Kids
This book on returning to one’s home culture offers different perspectives than most others. It is written for the broader expatriate world and discusses specific groups (peace corp, military, missionaries etc.). After a look at the stages of re-entry, the author considers the particular needs of the employee, the spouse and children.
This practical older book covers the re-entry process starting on the field. It talks about how to prepare and leave well, as well as how to adjust back in North America. It also offers lots of ideas on smoothing the transition for adults and children. The focus of this book seems to be more on the adult missionary and written for the parents of MKs.
Cristina, an MK growing up in Brazil, has spent months dreaming about her quinze anos party, the 15th birthday celebration when a girl becomes a young lady. Now the family is on furlough in Minnesota, and Cristina is certain her quinze anos will be a disappointment. To make things worse, she finds it difficult to fit in at school despite the welcome of Lisa, her best friend from the previous furlough. Although Lisa generally includes her in activities, Cristina feels like an outsider, unable to find anyone who understands or cares about the things that are important to her. Uncertain of the latest styles or slang, she often feels foolish at school. Nevertheless, she is drawn to Jason, whose part-Korean ancestry makes him stand out too though in appearance rather than behavior. Together they face the attacks of the “in” crowd and discover that there are positive things about being “between two worlds.”
Despite its somewhat cheesy title, this is a really enjoyable and relatable read. It even shows how different TCKs from the same family can react to moving and goodbyes differently. The story is a little older so social media and cell phones aren’t part of the teenage world in “Between Two Worlds” but the dynamics of US American public school are still relevant.
TCKs –MKs in particular– can have mixed experiences in US American churches, both in visiting when their families are fundraising in churches, and when they try to find a church home when they’re older. In these interviews TCKs are asked:
Ministry hazards can take their toll on children of missionaries and pastors. Sanford, both an MK (missionary kid) and PK (preacher’s kid) speaks with candor and honesty about the faulty conclusions kids raised by parents in full-time ministry may have internalized about themselves, God, or their world. This book has been embraced by many adult MKs, who find themselves described in its pages. Sanford doesn’t address cultural issues in this book, so it isn’t applicable to all TCKs, only those whose parents were involved in ministry.
You may need a box or two of tissues while you work through this book, and maybe a journal to record the lies that you believed growing up that still affect your life. I was amazed by the insightfulness of this book and felt like Sanford had looked into my head to understand me so well!